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best of craigslist > new york > penis caught in my zipper at el biet - m4w Originally Posted: Fri, 1 Jan 22:21 EST
Date: 2010-01-01, 10:21PM EST
best of craigslist > washington, DC > The Grinding Wheels of Justice Bunkbed Originally Posted: Sat, 2 Jan 10:05 EST
Date: 2010-01-02, 10:05AM EST
best of craigslist > seattle > World's most uncomfortable saddle Originally Posted: Fri, 1 Jan 23:41 PST
Date: 2010-01-01, 11:41PM PST
best of craigslist > new york > 1500 live ladybugs, accidently bought while drunk, feels bad. Originally Posted: Sat, 5 Dec 15:34 EST
Date: 2009-12-05, 3:34PM EST
penis caught in my zipper at el biet - m4w
Date: 2010-01-01, 10:21PM EST
i had just gone in for a normal pee, but the way you pounded, and pounded, and pounded on the door screaming "out! i have diarrhea! out! for the love of god come out, its coming out of my butt, pleeeeease!!!" got me so turned on that i got an erection. then, because your kicking started splintering the door, i quickly yanked up my zipper and caught my penis up in the process. i'm sorry again for the screaming as you pushed me down and sat down with the door hanging off it's hinges, but the look of sheer horror and embarrassment we shared in front of the staff and other patrons looking on before you ran out the back door and climbed over the fence has captured my heart. please describe what i was wearing so i know its you.
PostingID: 1533449788- Location: williamsburg
- it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
best of craigslist > washington, DC > The Grinding Wheels of Justice Bunkbed Originally Posted: Sat, 2 Jan 10:05 EST
The Grinding Wheels of Justice Bunkbed
Date: 2010-01-02, 10:05AM EST
So there you are, suddenly single after fifteen years of faithful monogamy that came to a crashing halt when you discovered that the other �partner� felt that monogamy only applied to one of you, and it wasn�t her. Now, despite the fact that you�ve been a hard-working sole provider for a decade and a half and you technically own half of a really nice, big, house in the burbs, you find yourself sitting in an unfurnished crappy little two-bedroom apartment little bigger than the one you first moved into straight out of college. You have an old table with one chair, a beat up couch you got from your folks back in the early 90s and which they got in the 70s, a mattress with no frame, and thank god, a tv. (But that bitch wouldn�t let you have the remote, would she?) You�re not exactly at the top of your game, but what�s worse is that you don�t know where the kids will sleep.
Yea, the kids. They still love you. They want to come and see you. They did nothing wrong. But now you have nowhere (other than the couch) for them to sleep.
Sound familiar? Well then have I got a deal for you. Feast your eyes upon the Grinding Wheels of Justice Bunkbed.
You see, it will get better. The wheels of karmic justice may grind slowly, but they grind exceedingly fine. You will reconstruct your ego, and your life. Then you�ll slowly start having a social life. You�ll fix some of those things about yourself you always wanted to fix but didn�t have the time/energy because you were so busy being provider/husband/father. You�ll meet a brilliant and gorgeous woman who, coincidentally, happens to be much younger than you. You�ll fall in love. For her part, your ex will fall into bankruptcy, get all sorts of inappropriate tattoos, and basically ruin her own life without any help from you. But the first step to all of that is having somewhere for the kids to sleep. That�s where the bunkbed comes in.
As you can see from the picture, it�s steel framed, relatively new, comes with two mattresses, and the bottom bunk is a couch until you pull it out into a futon. So here is the scale:
If any or all of this applies to you, if you are the one who was cheated (male or female) on and you STILL had to move out and need somewhere for your kids to sleep: $75 and hell, I�ll throw in some pillows for you.
If you are a single mother or father, perhaps for other reasons, it�s still a bargain at $100
If you are a young couple, working hard to make ends meet but doing pretty well, with your whole lives in front of you: $101
If you are the one who cheated in your marriage/partnership, the one who had to leave the house because you could not stop your libido from overruling your vows: $3,275. And I get to punch you in the face. In fact, I'll probably do that anyway, on the principle of the thing.
PostingID: 1533779057Yea, the kids. They still love you. They want to come and see you. They did nothing wrong. But now you have nowhere (other than the couch) for them to sleep.
Sound familiar? Well then have I got a deal for you. Feast your eyes upon the Grinding Wheels of Justice Bunkbed.
You see, it will get better. The wheels of karmic justice may grind slowly, but they grind exceedingly fine. You will reconstruct your ego, and your life. Then you�ll slowly start having a social life. You�ll fix some of those things about yourself you always wanted to fix but didn�t have the time/energy because you were so busy being provider/husband/father. You�ll meet a brilliant and gorgeous woman who, coincidentally, happens to be much younger than you. You�ll fall in love. For her part, your ex will fall into bankruptcy, get all sorts of inappropriate tattoos, and basically ruin her own life without any help from you. But the first step to all of that is having somewhere for the kids to sleep. That�s where the bunkbed comes in.
As you can see from the picture, it�s steel framed, relatively new, comes with two mattresses, and the bottom bunk is a couch until you pull it out into a futon. So here is the scale:
If any or all of this applies to you, if you are the one who was cheated (male or female) on and you STILL had to move out and need somewhere for your kids to sleep: $75 and hell, I�ll throw in some pillows for you.
If you are a single mother or father, perhaps for other reasons, it�s still a bargain at $100
If you are a young couple, working hard to make ends meet but doing pretty well, with your whole lives in front of you: $101
If you are the one who cheated in your marriage/partnership, the one who had to leave the house because you could not stop your libido from overruling your vows: $3,275. And I get to punch you in the face. In fact, I'll probably do that anyway, on the principle of the thing.
- Location: Capitol Hill
- it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
best of craigslist > seattle > World's most uncomfortable saddle Originally Posted: Fri, 1 Jan 23:41 PST
World's most uncomfortable saddle
Date: 2010-01-01, 11:41PM PST
Like a ghastly specter from your darkest nightmare, this saddle has returned from the grave seeking vengeance. Its previous master thought it had banished it to the blackness of the abyss for good, but nay, it was only for an epoch.
Features:
*Steel rails forged by LUCIFER himself
*Genuine Auroch hide seat provides maximum chafing
I am reaching the end of my strength, as the madness contained within this dark artifact threatens to consume me. I cannot merely throw this adamantine saddle on the rubbish heap, lest some unwary passerby become transfixed by its lightless glow. No, I must only give this to one with the courage to look into the bloodshot eyes of insanity, and the strength to master it. A wizard with the cunning to master this beast gains an ally of unspeakable power: the ultimate theft deterrent. At the moment the thief straddles your steed, his fate is sealed. Eager for revenge upon mortals, the saddle will visit his arse with blisters that rival the torment of fire and brimstone... a dire lesson he will not soon forget. This same fate will befall any unworthy mortal who in his arrogance, attempts to mount the saddle of doom. Are you worthy?
PostingID: 1533612838Features:
*Steel rails forged by LUCIFER himself
*Genuine Auroch hide seat provides maximum chafing
I am reaching the end of my strength, as the madness contained within this dark artifact threatens to consume me. I cannot merely throw this adamantine saddle on the rubbish heap, lest some unwary passerby become transfixed by its lightless glow. No, I must only give this to one with the courage to look into the bloodshot eyes of insanity, and the strength to master it. A wizard with the cunning to master this beast gains an ally of unspeakable power: the ultimate theft deterrent. At the moment the thief straddles your steed, his fate is sealed. Eager for revenge upon mortals, the saddle will visit his arse with blisters that rival the torment of fire and brimstone... a dire lesson he will not soon forget. This same fate will befall any unworthy mortal who in his arrogance, attempts to mount the saddle of doom. Are you worthy?
- Location: Green Lake
- it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
best of craigslist > new york > 1500 live ladybugs, accidently bought while drunk, feels bad. Originally Posted: Sat, 5 Dec 15:34 EST
1500 live ladybugs, accidently bought while drunk, feels bad.
Date: 2009-12-05, 3:34PM EST
So, after consuming pot brownies and getting a little too drunk on thanksgiving a friend and i decided to buy 1500 live ladybugs from amazon, which was a great idea until they came in the mail. Now they're sitting on my windowsill and I have nothing to really do with them. If i set them free they'll die in this weather, if I leave them on my windowsill they'll die.
So, if you have a greenhouse or some kind of animals to feed them to it'd be awesome. I don't want to ruin 1500 lives.
Email me and tell me what your'e gonna do with them, and if you can come pick them up. And they're yours.
PostingID: 1496543734
So, if you have a greenhouse or some kind of animals to feed them to it'd be awesome. I don't want to ruin 1500 lives.
Email me and tell me what your'e gonna do with them, and if you can come pick them up. And they're yours.
- Location: park slope
- it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests
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